My head snapped up as fire burned from my eyes. Immediately my friend's face filled with pure guilt as I she refused to look me in the eye, turning away ever so slightly.
"I know you hate him, but he is so funny." I continued to stare at her. "It's my guilty pleasure, okay?" I said nothing. "I don't know why I like him so much!" Guilt poured from her face as she looked shamefully down at her computer while Jon made a snide remark regarding what he calls "Baraknephobia."
Haha... I know you are all laughing as you read this. I know. Cute right? Haha, let's all get in our little laughs. It's so clever and whitty... Oh that silly Jon Stewart....
WAKE UP PEOPLE!!!! This man is all that is WRONG with American media right now. I know, I know, I sound crazy. Let me try and spell this out for you in simple terms, playing it down for you, the same way little Jonny does...
Jon Stewart is the bro ho that swaggers in wearing chinos and dock shoes with his frat buddies, talking about IPO's and start ups, while women swoon. Eventually he takes you home from the bar, after you pay his and his buddies tab, bangs you in his crappy apartment, telling you he has to be up early for a meeting and with a smile, sends you home in a cab that you end up paying for. You wake up the next morning all smiles having met this great guy only to realize, after you piece the evening together, that the night cost you $150.00, your pride and conveniently, he forgot to ask you for your number.
Are we getting the picture yet?
He is the wolf in sheep's clothing your mother warns you about and your dad tries to spot for you. He's the cool kid that makes you want to be on his team only to convince you to tape the small guy to his locker and while you all laugh, you end up taking the fall when the gym teacher walks in.
Smart. Very smart. He is making a fool of all of us and no one wants to see it. Who doesn't want to be the best friend of the cool guy? The smart funny guy that isn't the jock, but seems so out of your league.
Whispering sweet nothings of the evils of anything not liberal, he laughingly convinces you to spread your political legs for the sake of humanity and being "educated" and suddenly you are the whore.
Of course it's funny to laugh at civil liberties being stripped away! Hahaha, Baraknephobia, what a cute way to convince the world that every conservative out there is a red-necked, uneducated, bigoted fool that beats small children from Africa. Yay!! Let's all join in!!! All he needs now is a theme song that small children sing with an American flag in the background with words something to the effect of:
"The world is full of smart and loving peeeeeeeeoooople,
and they are called deeeeeemmoocraaaaaaats,
if you don't like them, you are full of haaaaaaaaaaate!
La la la, la la la!"
A ditty of a little tune you can't help but sing in the shower.
Oh I admit, he is seductive. He is a sly one for sure. Even I, before I realized what was truly happening, laughed along with the crowd. Then I turned around and looked at the crowd only to realize no one was blinking and everyone laughed at the same time. I immediately stopped laughing.
He makes love to the American public with witticism and coy phrasings, all the while dumbing down information and truth just enough to not be either, convincing everyone they would be much smarter and cooler if they just joined in the laughter at things that really aren't funny.
I think the amazing thing is how many conservatives I know that just love him. It shocks me. Is there no awareness here?
Ugh! My frustration is just mounting. Between the Jon Stewart's and the Sean Penn's of this world, conservatives don't stand a chance, unless we start paying attention and stop laughing when it isn't funny.
If we don't, we are just going to continue to be the democrats whore house with Jon's as the pimp with a wink and a smile.
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